Surround Yourself With Supportive Individuals
While my area of expertise is weight loss and wellness, today’s topic applies to ANY situation- when you are working towards achieving a goal; you need positive supportive folks in your corner. The joy suckers, energy vampires, Debbie Downer’s and negative nellies, nay sayers need not apply! In fact, avoid them as much as possible!
People never achieve goals solely on their own, there is always someone along that way who offers support, encouragement, and praise, and who believes in the goal, and believes in you. Napoleon Hill called this a Mastermind Group. Who is in your Mastermind Group? Who needs to be in your Mastermind Group? Your Mastermind Group helps you work towards your goals and provides you with the information and encouragement you need. The group can comprise friends, family, neighbors, professionals with the information or access to information you need to be successful, anyone to offer sound, educated, positive advice and encouragement who genuinely has your best interest in mind.
There do seem to be an inordinate amount of people who for some reason or another, are not supportive of you and actually seem to be working against you. We mentioned them in the first paragraph and some of you may have some other more colorful names. In the weight loss field, we caution our journeyers to be on the lookout for a creature that seeks to sabotage your efforts – the feeder. Feeders have many faces and can be any age, male or female, know or unknown and they all have a common goal — to sabotage your weight loss efforts. It's essential to your success to spend time with individuals who support you in your dreams, goals and efforts to lose weight and draw burning determination from those attempting to thwart your efforts. Actually imagine that every attempt the feeders make is fueling your determination fire and the brighter and hotter it burns, the more determined you are to succeed. Feeders have their own determination as well, though many times, it is totally unconscious- think and imagine, they are not even in control and have no idea what they are doing.
Why FEEDERS do what they do:
- Often feeders don’t want to look at their own weight and health issues, and your weight loss is a reflection back to them of what they need to do
- Jealous that you are taking action when they have been thinking of the same thing for months, or possibly years.
- Concerned that they may not be the identified “fit” or “skinny” person in the group anymore-you are now their competition.
- Believe that love is spelled F-O-O-D, this is how these individuals express their love for you and if you are not eating their love, they feel rejected, unwanted, or that they are not showing their love for you.
- Don’t want to lose their eating/drinking/indulging buddy. You were always the one who would try the desserts, have the extra helping with them, and go out with them for drinks and bar food. They think to themselves…”now who am I going to go out with?”
They are not in control and guess who is? YOU! HA! You are in control with a burning desire to succeed and no one can stop you! Here are some other specific tips and tricks to sidestep those attempting to throw a barricade in your way.
These tips for staying strong and in control during difficult or challenging situations are adapted from Dr. Wayne W. Dyer who has written many books, including "Pulling Your Own Strings" and "Your Erroneous Zones,":
- Avoid letting others make you feel guilty about your commitment to losing weight and being healthy (remember, this is your goal and each attempt fuels your determination fire!).
- Avoid being seduced by the efforts of victimizers to sabotage your weight-loss program (again, think FIRE, FIRE, FIRE and burning desire to succeed!).
- Plan in advance what you might say when in a challenging situation pertaining to food. For example, think ahead about what to say if someone is encouraging you to eat something that will impede your weight-loss goals at a restaurant, party, work function or friend's house. Practice assertive sentences.
- Say "no" when appropriate. People respect a firm no.
- "Accept the simple fact that many won't ever understand you, and that is OK ... You can refuse to argue or try to convince anyone of the rightness of your stance and simply believe it."
- Commit to your goals. "You can do anything you set your mind to accomplish. You are strong, capable and not the least bit brittle."
Now that you are equipped with a Mastermind Group, a radar for saboteurs and a method to turn destruction into construction and burning desire, you are UNSTOPPABLE!
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